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i’ll show you mine
February 25, 2010
A comment thread on another website got me thinking: did I ever share my favourite pickup line story with y’all? I might have, but it’s short and sweet so here it is again anyway:
It was, I think, the summer of 1986; I was 14 years old and loitering around the playground of my old elementary school around 8:00 in the evening with a boy named Joe. Joe was a year or two older than me, 16 maybe. He hadn’t lived in our town long, having been recently shipped to the other parent while on probation for something about which I don’t know the details. The setting must have inspired him, because he suddenly, in the middle of an otherwise normal conversation, came out with the very juvenile suggestion “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours”. Then he whipped down his fly and displayed his junk, indistinct in the fading evening light and the shadow of the school building (thank goodness; teenager penis is something nobody ever needs to see). This was immediately followed by what is still one of the best lines I’ve ever heard: “Now that we’ve seen each other’s genitalia, maybe we should introduce them sometime?”. So smooth. Never mind that he hadn’t even seen mine.
Ever the deflector, I said “Don’t you have a curfew?”. To which he looked at his watch, swore, and lit off across the field and home.
In retrospect I’m surprised that boy even knew a big word like “genitalia”. And I wouldn’t be at all shocked to learn that he’d heard that line in a bad movie.
Posted by jodi on February 25, 2010 at 9.39am
Categories: dumbass
Comments on "i’ll show you mine"
I was hoping it would be the “I’ve got a $5000 limit on my credit card and I’m gonna spend it all here” story (complete with neck clamp); but you’re right, “Haven’t you got a curfew” is better.
Posted by Peter on February 25, 2010 at 2.55pm :: link
Hahahahaha.
Posted by Norma on February 27, 2010 at 9.33am :: link