in which the beast finally frees itself
July 3, 2012
Today began as a lazy, sleeping in day: we had left the alarm off and were awakened by a sudden and violent thunderstorm, only rising when driving rains made closing some windows a necessity. The day was quickly downgraded from a “walk to the gym” day to a “yoga at home” day, because RAIN. So mid-morning I dragged my dusty yoga mat out of the corner and unrolled it in the middle of the living room, in the same spot where Peter does his yoga every morning.
I stood at the top of my mat, feet together. Took in a deep breath, raised my arms over my head, looked up at the drooping ceiling above me and thought, hmm, wouldn’t it be funny if the ceiling (which has been drooping for a very long time, due to a long-since repaired leak that happened before we owned the house) picked this moment to collapse, when I haven’t done yoga at home in months?
I swept into a deep forward bend, held it for a moment, placed my hands on the mat, stepped back into a plank, lowered myself into cobra then up into downward dog. 5 breaths. Then stepped my right foot back to the top of the mat, raised my head a little, and. . .
Half a dozen tiny crumbs of plaster dropped onto the mat next to my hands.
I stepped up to the front of the mat, looked up, and felt a light dust on my face. I stepped off the mat, a few feet away into the doorway of the dining room and called Claire from the kitchen to come and have a look. We marveled at how the gaping crevice in the ceiling no longer resembled a demonic grin (which I had dubbed “Azazello” due to its once sporting a single jaunty fang, before the gap widened enough for the fang to disappear).
We laughed about the prospect of the ceiling falling on me when Peter does his yoga safely every morning in exactly the same spot. I was just about to work in a “rain on my wedding day” joke when The Beast burst forth from its plaster bonds and leapt to the floor in a powdery crash. Right at the top of my yoga mat.

Azazello in March 2011, slowly flexing its maw
Kevin is perplexed.
Nobody is doing any yoga here today. But soon we will be doing some drywalling.
Posted by jodi on July 3, 2012 at 1.06pm




